Sexual One
Passion, Zeal, and Conviction
The following description is an excerpt from our Essential Enneagram Reference Guide:
Sexual Ones focus their drive for perfectionism, as well as moral and ethical purity, on their interpersonal relationships with chosen intimates. They want to ensure they are the ideal mental, emotional, and physical partner, friend, and family member to the people they hold near and dear. They focus on the romantic/intimate arena and, like all Sexual types, constantly search for the perfect connection with the ideal mate. Sexual Ones believe relational perfection is attained if both parties strive for internal and external excellence.
Sexual Ones are much more fiery and likely to demonstrate anger than the Self- Preservation or Social subtypes. They can be reactive and even explosive if something comes into their awareness that they find objectionable. Like all Ones, they have high internal standards, but they focus much of that attention on themselves and their partner. They can seem 8ish by asserting their opinions and are bold and forceful if someone violates their convictions, morals, or standards.
Sexual Ones are deeply fearful that they will not measure up to their chosen others' ideals and are relentless with themselves about constant inner and outer improvement. They expect the special people in their lives will put forth the same effort to become their ideal. They believe they have a divine right to their partners, children, or other close relations and that if they don't get the same time, energy, or consideration from their special people, they feel intense anger (and shame) rise. Their anger is evident in romantic relationships, where jealousy is the predominant emotion accompanying their outrage regarding their intimate relationships being threatened.
Sexual Ones are afraid that if they thoroughly let themselves unleash their passion and fire, they will disgrace themselves and the people they care about because they may misbehave. They always feel constricted and struggle with the pull between their intense and passionate desires for freedom and expression and the need to be appropriate and measured.
Exemplars: Sidney Poitier, Christian Bale, Joan of Arc, Lawrence Fishburne, George Harrison, David Koresh, Queen Elizabeth I, Evangelist, Crusader, Scarlett Johansson, Meredith Marks, Phoebe Bridgers, Gillian Anderson